Life, Mindfulness

How overthinking is stopping your Inner Peace and Increasing Anxiety

I DO NOT ALLOW THINGS TO STICK TO ME AND WEIGH ME DOWN,
I FLY ABOVE THEM, I OBSERVE THEM – LovefromCara.com

So let me guess it goes a little something like this:

Me: I need to sleep now.

Brain: Hahahahahaha! no! we have to stay up all night again and think back through every stupid little thing you’ve done in your life to bring you to this moment in time. Wait. where’s your phone I want to look at new dresses and google weird questions. 3am is the best time to do that you know.

Me:…..Okay then.

People often struggle to clear their mind, myself included.We struggle because we try to force something that…..just is. Inner peace is inner peace and its right there for you to take it anytime. Our problem is we try to force things to happen. We stress ourselves to find answers to problems, we stress trying to find CALM. We TRY to make ourselves relax after a long day when there really is no “doing” in this. To find calm you just…. let go.

You need to let go of the constant “searching” and “Trying” and forcing. To achieve this ‘Oh so good’ time of peace you need to stop thinking of how you want things to be in your life and about your worries. Let go of trying to find a solution to every dam thing. Just stop. Take the hamster off the wheel he’s running on and put him to bed with some lettuce or something……sorry for the weird description.

Just like everyone else I have had those hectic days where you try to calm down and try to think straight to get your day back on track and it just won’t happen. The more you try to relax the more your thoughts race, you struggle against the tide more and more when you just need to drift. Don’t think about how to drift, why to drift or well….anything just surrender to what is.

YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN’T DO IT

When you actually give in you will see that in this moment right now the only one who’s stopping you from chilling out for two minutes is you and your constant belief that you need to do something or you feeling like these thoughts must come…..that’s ALL YOU and you can stop that. You have lots of ideas about yourself and who you are but what if right now you just let go of every single idea about yourself and how your life should be. You would feel pretty free wouldn’t you?

YOU BELIEVE YOU NEED TO DO EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW

This can be difficult for me at times as I am someone who likes to achieve and constantly be creating new things. If I go a day where I just watch movies or I sleep in I end up being really hard on myself and feel like I have wasted time. THIS IS A BELIEF. It is a reality I have chosen for myself. Does the world end if I take a jammy day?? no. You can’t “DO” all day and night every day for the rest of your life you will get burned out.

Being productive and achieving things is something we are taught to value at a very early age which is why we feel useless when we don’t tick something off our list for the day and why we sometimes push our minds to the point of exploding.

This need you have to get everything done is just a feeling you allow to exist in a moment, when you can also allow yourself to be free of it.

Everything takes time. Time can’t be rushed.

YOU’VE HAD YEARS OF PRACTICE

You have been conditioned towards all the bad things over the years. You know how to worry, stress, push yourself, criticise yourself, compare yourself with others. We all know how to attract negativity with more negativity. This could be the first time in your life you are learning it’s actually okay to just be. To just exist and breath free of thoughts. So no it’s not that easy to just “Drop your problems” but you better start believing you can.

YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN IT’S ALWAYS BEEN THERE

As a baby you did not know fear or worries or problems or have pressures and deadlines. You created and learnt these over time. You learnt behaviours and habits good and bad. Imagine your mind was an empty room at that moment and you have filled it with so much crap over the years. Most of this stuff you have hoarded into your room is useless to you. Yet you allow these thoughts to pull at you from every angle. The list of things you give yourself to do will never ever end.

You are like a sponge and you absorb so much negative energy from what is around you on a daily basis. You pile garbage on top of garbage and never let it go. It creates an irritable stressed nature. You are in control of what you focus your mind on. For example if you have a troubled past and you have made mistakes and then you obsess about them and never allow the past to take a back seat it will forever be in your present. Let it go. Or life will pass you by and you will never feel happy and fulfilled.

Inside you is something peaceful and knowing. It’s always been there.

 

YOU MADE A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

Sorry but it’s true. If you tell little white lies even small, tiny, stupid ones like making up an excuse to not have to go somewhere, they can later come back and haunt you. The memory of the moment you do something that is not the real or true you will usually flashback. We are human but you can choose to be more in control. Be as honest as you can be without hurting others but be true to you. Avoid empty promises and try to mean things when you say them. It helps.

YOU CLING TO PAST MOMENTS

These moments are simply what they are. Past. They no longer exist except in your own head. We start to define ourselves from what we know about things we did or that happened to us in the past. There is always some grieving time especially if what happened was particularly traumatic, this is normal but you should not let it control your life and happiness. It will keep replaying if you let it.

Remember my sweet cupcakes that everyone makes mistakes and things go wrong, you are not your mistakes. Learn what you can from them but don’t let them dominate your present moment.

FACE YOUR CHALLENGES CALMLY, GO SILENT, GO BLANK FOR A MOMENT, IF YOUR MIND IS FULL OF TOO MANY CLOUDS, HOW WILL YOU SEE THE SKY? – LovefromCara.com

YOU WANT HAPPINESS RIGHT NOW!

As mentioned above things take time. You have a whole rainbow of emotions its okay to feel them. Remember you have control. Happiness comes and goes as does sadness it is part of life. We all experience these things. Stop comparing yourself and what you have with others and If you keep questing for “things” to make you happy you will never have enough things. Be yourself and stop worrying about what others think of you. You can be many things, public you and private you, both are okay, both can be part of you.

IF A CHILD STOOD THERE, LIKE AN ADULT WOULD, THINKING ABOUT THE POSSIBLE DANGERS OF DOING A CARTWHEEL, AND ALL THE THINGS THAT COULD GO WRONG, THE EMBARRASSMENT THEY WOULD FEEL, STRESSING ABOUT EVERY LITTLE THING, THEN THERE WOULD BE NO CARTWHEELS- LovefromCara.com

 

Resetting your beliefs about yourself and what is okay takes time. Just like how learning negative things took time. It will become easier and if you take it step by step and become more aware of yourself, situations and beliefs that could be toxic. We don’t actually need much to be happy but we are living in a world that is very fast paced and quite….fake at times. We spend too much time trying to keep up and not giving ourselves a chance to just be a human being….not a human doing.

Leave your comments below and have a wonderful day!

EXTRA EXTRA: This is quite a simple example of some overthinking I just wanted to include. I gave my mom some toast and a jar of marmalade she could spread herself. She had not eaten breakfast and I knew she was hungry. She immediately protested saying she did not want toast or marmalade. I came back to find she had eaten them and really enjoyed it. I asked her why she had said she didn’t want it at the start. She said because she was thinking too much about the awkwardness of taking the marmalade out of the jar….. These were negative thoughts she did not need to have at all, she is also used to being a giver as a mother and all of this over thinking and silliness could have prevented her from just enjoying a snack…..probably the oddest example I can think of but still there it is 😛

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